Spiritual People Don’t Get Angry: The Lie that Keeps You Stagnant

“I thought you were spiritual, why are you upset?”  “Wow, doesn’t it lower your vibration to get angry?”  We’ve all heard it before, and if we’re honest, many of us have probably fallen for it, even if just for a moment. We believe that being spiritual means we can’t also get angry or express our emotions, especially emotions that are often viewed as negative. But not getting angry, not feeling our emotions, that’s emotional suppression, and emotional suppression hinders growth and healing.

We’ve been conditioned to believe that anger is “low vibration” and expressing anger means you’re not “enlightened” or truly not a spiritual person. We fall into the trap of believing we must always stay calm and detached and unaffected by everything. This mindset is not only unrealistic but also harmful. It’s how we find ourselves stuck in the vicious cycle of toxic positivity.

Spirituality isn’t about suppressing our emotions and feelings, it’s about learning how to process and react to your emotions responsibly. It’s about understanding them, working through them, and using them as tools for growth.

Why Do We Believe Anger is Unspiritual?

This isn’t a new belief, as a matter of fact, many spiritual and self-help communities push the idea that anger is something to “transcend” instead of a way to check in with ourselves and our situation. But when we are open to this idea it’s easy to become engrossed in toxic positivity culture and the idea that only good vibes are acceptable. That causes us to have unresolved issues that later present as unhealed trauma because instead of dealing with the issue, we covered it with false positivity instead.

Anger is not the opposite of spirituality; it’s an essential part of it. We have to do the work if we want to see the progress. Working through anger is a part of the journey of working through trauma. Instead of being afraid of anger, pay attention to it, it’s a signal that something within you needs attention. Anger tells you when your boundaries have been crossed, it reveals an injustice, or it shows you where you have some inner wounds that need to be healed.

When you find yourself becoming angry, instead of putting those feelings away in a box and labeling it as bad, ask yourself the following questions:

What am I actually angry about?

What is this anger trying to tell me?

Where in my life do I feel unheard, disrespected, or unsafe?

How can I use this energy constructively instead of suppressing it?

When you process your emotions correctly, it can lead to clarity, transformation and necessary action to help you push forward and move into a space where both growth and healing are able to happen. 

The Consequences of Suppressing Anger

What Happens when you suppress your feelings, especially anger? It festers and starts to affect your overall wellness. Suppressed anger turns into resentment and bitterness. Before you know it your body will start to show physical signs, headaches, chronic stress, fatigue, anxiety. Pretending to be at peace will lead to emotional burnout and eventually you will explode at someone else, or at yourself.

How to Move Through Anger in a Healthy Way

Spirituality and self-work don’t mean you have to be a master at handling your emotions, it just means you should deal with them instead of avoiding them. Here are a few steps you can take to deal with your angry in a healthy way:

1.      Acknowledge You Are Angry Without Self-Judgement: “I feel angry right now, and that’s okay”

2.      Identify the Root Cause of Your Anger: Is it connected to the current situation, or something deeper? Many times, anger is actually linked to unresolved past wounds.

3.      Move the Energy: instead of just sitting with it, move through it, try some breathwork, exercise, journal.

4.      Channel Your Feelings into Action: Use your anger as fuel for something productive until you are able to calmly work through your emotions. When used wisely, anger can be a catalyst for transformation.

5.      Find Stillness After Expression: Once you’ve released your anger, give yourself some time and space to adjust and regain balance, don’t just sit in those emotions. Meditate, ground, exercise, rest. Release those feelings and let them go so you can move on.

Anger is a Part of Healing

Anger, like all emotions, is not counterproductive to growth or spirituality. It is an essential part of understanding yourself, allowing yourself to grow and experience the full process of healing. Some of the greatest leaders in history have used anger as fuel for change. They didn’t let it consume them, but they also didn’t dismiss it. They listened to what it was teaching them and used it as a guide toward action and transformation.

Spirituality isn’t about being untouched by life’s difficulties, it’s about meeting them with awareness, including the difficult emotions that come with them. Anger isn’t weakness, it’s a teacher, the only question is: Are you willing to listen?